I’m a little frustrated right now. It’s not like a yelling or throwing things kind of frustrated. It’s not even like a rant kind of frustrated. I’m not aggravated at any particular person or thing. It’s more like frustrated at a set of circumstances.
I get like this every once in awhile. I stop letting things just roll off my back and instead become so aggravated by the way people behave that I just decide not to participate.
So, I have spent the last few days not participating in anything that I don’t want to do. It’s not really a bad thing. Sometimes I think I participate too much, and therefore people begin to take me for granted. So it’s good to sit back and do nothing for a little while. It also gives me time to really evaluate whether or not I am participating in things that are truly worthy of my time and energy.
Today I realized that people, who say you should give from the heart without expectation of receiving anything in return, are full of crap. There is always an expectation of some kind, even if it’s just that whatever you give will be appreciated. And if you are giving without expecting it to at least be appreciated, then shame on you. That’s what the natives call a doormat.
Admittedly, I am one of those people who is constantly thinking of and doing for other people. As a result, I tend to forget about doing things for me. And a good friend just reminded me that when I do as much as I do for others, I tend to train them to expect it and, at times, take it for granted. When that happens, it is important for me to take that step back and only do the things that are about me for a little while.
The beauty in all of this is that I know I am not alone. I’m not the only giver in this world and I am certainly not the only one who is so busy thinking of others that they forget to think about themselves.
So, I decided that rather than writing some warm and fuzzy stuff about the new year, I should be honest about how I am feeling right now and remind us all that it’s okay to feel this way. It’s okay to take that step back once in awhile and only participate in things that are for and about you. It’s okay to not be willing to sit on the phone with people who only want to talk about their problems, drama, needs or issues. It’s okay to stop doing for others long enough for them to remember not to take you for granted. And if they don’t remember not to take you for granted, then it’s okay to stop doing for them at all. The serial takers in your life will only be takers as long as you continue blindly giving.
So, moving forward, in this “New Year,” remember to make some time to be for and about you. And if those around you aren’t lovingly giving you that time, then take it. You are definitely worth it.
See you next month for our 13th Anniversary Issue!

See you next month,
Tina Sordellini